Saying no is important with uncountable positive impacts. The best reason why we should start saying no is to save our energy from draining. Sometimes after saying yes, we regret being around a person who is just wasting our time or draining our energy.
Saying NO to a person sometimes weakens our relationships but remember, we can always correct them (if we want to), but we can’t get our time and energy back!
So, Start saying no to people, places and things that drain your energy.
“It is only by saying NO that you can concentrate on the things that are really important”STEVE JOBS
Sometimes we have to think about putting ourselves and our time first. And if we don’t anyone can take your time for no value.
Most valuable positive side of saying no is that it allows us to value ourselves more. We start valuing our time and energy.
Why is it difficult to say no?
People find it difficult to say no, because they are afraid of dismantling relationships, they want to be kind person, they think it’s bad to say no, etc.
People worry over –if they said no they might feel guilty later. You would say no to energy vampires, being guilty of that doesn’t make any sense. In fact it’s great that you didn’t let that vampire suck your energy.
Most common reasons why it’s hard to say no to someone include one or multiple of these;
Don’t want to disappoint or hurt someone
We don’t want to disappoint someone by saying no. But remember, you do good as well sometimes so if you have to disappoint someone for good, don’t hesitate. They will understand it later or you will have a good way to explain to them.
Fear of dispute
Many of us are afraid of conflict. We don’t like others to be angry with us or critical of us. We therefore avoid saying “no” when we are afraid that it will put us into conflict with someone else, whether that someone is an intimate partner, a colleague or friend.
Guilty feeling afterwards
Without hesitation you would say ‘yes’ because you think if you said no you will feel guilty afterwards.
Being a People Pleaser
People pleaser never say no! And being a people pleaser consumes a lot of your time. Because a people pleaser always wants to stay good and humble person. In order to stay good for others they give up their time and energy without second thought.
Why saying no is important?
Society has taught us why saying yes is important. They had taught us to say yes to avoid conflicts, stay in peace with everyone, and make strong relationships. They taught us saying no is impolite and inconsiderate.
“When we say yes to something, we also say no to other thing”
But why no one tells them, peace with everyone begins within. We have to stay mentally stable to strengthen relationships. Why does no one remind them that saying yes to drainful peoples is also saying no to ourselves and things that matter to us.
You need these three reasons to understand impotance of saying no.
To create your own boundaries
Motive to create boundaries is to remind people that you CAN say no. And your time has to be respected.
When you create boundaries for yourself, everyone would at least think once before they approach you for your time.
Again, this doesn’t have to be rude. Remember, you can always explain your situation, work ethic or movement toward your goal, next time you meet them or by just sending a text.
Your time matters & is valuable
If you have extra time, you can choose to spend or invest anyway you want. But along with time we also give away our energy. Therefore, it is important to understand our energy has to be invested wisely for greater return.
Saying no to energy consuming people will save our time and energy bringing you more opportunities to invest with or in what makes you joyful.
You can only have control of your time, saying no will make it more valuable. Say yes to what you love and truly want.
To prevent burnout
Saying yes to your boss everytime, will burn you out. Saying yes to uncle or aunt for silly tasks that you don’t like to do will eventually irritate you. At the end to get out of this devastating loop, you have to say no. That’s only way.
Burnout will impact your lifestyle, not the other person’s. It will impact your productivity. Burnout will impact your side projects. That’s why saying NO is crucial.
4 ways to say no nicely
Use kindness in words
Being little rude is good when someone crosses boundaries. But that should not be primary action to say no. Start with kindness. Yes, saying no kindly is possible. For eg. “I don’t have enough time on my plate to offer you quality help”, “Thank you for thinking of me”.
Go straight to reasons for saying no
Most of the time, giving someone a reason why you can’t join them is the best way to define your boundaries.
Demonstrate gratitude for being asked
A small amount of appreciation might soften the way you say no when someone asks you to do something. Thanking someone for an offer demonstrates that you value their position as well.
Understand, then reply
One thing has to be clear, not everyone wants to take advantage of you. Some just want you to assist. That’s where we get to understand and reply with kindness and explaining your reasons.
8 Polite sentences to say “No”
- Thanks for thinking of me, but I have too much on my plate right now.
- I’m not really into it, but thanks for asking!
- Sadly, I have something else going on.
- I wish I were able to.
- I’m honored you asked me, but I simply can’t.
- Thanks for thinking of me. However, I’m not able to.
- Unfortunately, I already have plans. Maybe next time!
- No, thank you, but it sounds lovely.