All of us want to succeed in life. And most of us don’t even know what success means. Success is satisfaction from life. Basically success can be defined as: FREEDOM to live life any way we want, without hurting others.
“You are only successful if you’re free to live your life the way you want”
Freedom is powerful, in fact it is the goal for every teenager, a person who doesn’t like his job and wants to quit, a couple with several misunderstandings, an aspiring traveler or entrepreneur with a lot of work.
There is no way to go back and change the beginning, but we can start where we are and change the ending.
If we stay attached and dependent on parents or on someone or something else we might not understand our true potential and live a mediocre life.
This blog post shares five things that you need to become independent and live on your own terms.
Why Freedom is important in our life?
Being independent in life will open doors to many more opportunities. Freedom allows us to live life on our own terms, we can take risks being independent of parents, we can travel and do many more things that we love by being financially free or spend more time with family by being independent of job.
Why personal freedom is necessary;
- To do whatever we want.
- So that we don’t depend on others.
- Spend our time on our terms.
- To live around people we love, etc.
To feel free, you must have a feeling of liberty in the sense that you need to feel like you are in control of your life, and have influence on your own world. When people feel like their life is not in their control, for a prolonged period of time, it can lead to chronic mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression. This is also a big reason to choose to be free.
How to attain personal independence? 4 Needs
All of us have to live life on our own needs by being self-dependent. There is no way we can escape that, unless our parents are super rich and we choose to live a comfortable and cozy life.
Below are five critical things we need to have if we want to be independent.
Financial stability plays a key role in the overall freedom of an individual. If you are not making money you are dependent either on family or friends. If you want to be free you have to learn to make money.
Why do we need financial freedom?
Do you love traveling? I do. And what pauses you when you think about it? Yes, that’s money. Earn to travel.
We need to start investing earlier. That’s why we need financial freedom earlier for financial security when we get old. It is said that if you start investing earlier in index funds, S&P500, etc. You will have great returns. (when you are consistent). So. Earn to invest.
Our parents might have spent money on our schooling, that’s good but most of us didn’t like that way of learning, though experiences in school were worth the money. But in a world of immense opportunities we need to become financially free so that we can invest that money in developing newer skills. Earn to learn
Last but not least, Earn to experience, when we travel, we build experiences, when we learn, we build experiences, when we go on a trip with friends we make experiences.
Spending money on experiences rather than material possessions give rise to happier emotions.
How do I become financially free?
Keep in mind the goal is to make enough money that you can achieve your desires along with work.
- Traditional route:
Get a degree
Join an internship
Get a job
Ask for a week off so that you can travel.
- Next generation route:
Learn a skill
search for work (tough part)
do the work
detach yourself slowly by hiring a team.
- Start your own business
Basically do what you love and don’t do what make you feel low.
There are tons of resources to learn about financial freedom, read my favorites;
Detach from Parents (Learn Responsibility)
Staying away from parents will teach you the most important lesson of being responsible. We take our own responsibility when we detach from our family. We eat food depending on ourselves, we live in an apartment/house by ourselves.
Staying with family makes our decision making skill weak, because all the major decisions are made by parents.
Parenting styles are different in the eastern and western world. Western parents provide freedom to their kids as they grow up, whereas in the east parents teach their kids to be more disciplined with system and traditions.
Why detach from parents?
- To become responsible.
- To learn to manage everything.
- Have a calm environment.
Basically, to become self-dependent in terms of personal maintenance you should leave your parents ( NOT an advice!! ) and learn to be responsible for yourself.
Detachment from parents should not be permanent. Spend some time, but keep in mind attachment is unhealthy.
Conscious Mental State
Self-awareness is a critical part in becoming truly independent. It is about being aware of who you are? and what do you want in life?
We must also visualize self-awareness in context to not being influenced by others. If others can shake our mental state, we’re not free. Freedom means to do what we want, to experience what we desire. And if we’re impacted by negative people we’ll remain dependent.
Lack of self-awareness will promote the illusion of freedom, leaving you with no existential choices.
How to have self-awareness?
- Meditate to understand yourself and get back control on emotions.
- Ask yourself impactful questions.
- Have self-talks more often.
- Try not to be influenced by emotions.
- Have a diary/journal and reflect everyday/week, etc.
Being aware of yourself you’ll open doors to several more exceptional experiences.
When we are aware of ourselves we are no more envious or jealous of anyone.
One big part of the mental state is emotions. If you follow your emotions and random thoughts blindly, you’re not free to follow what you really want.
Dump the victim mentality
Victim mentality is a major hurdle to attain freedom. Because if we don’t feel energized and feel insecure we’re not free yet.
Victim mentality is a state of mind where a person feels he’s alone, nobody supports him and everyone is against him. People with such a mentality keep believing that no matter what, bad things keep happening to them for sure.
Characteristics of Victim Mindset
- They think others are intentionally trying to hurt them.
- They refuse to evaluate their beliefs or try to improve things in life.
- They blame others for feeling miserable.
- They feel “nothing can be changed in life”.
How to dump the victim mentality?
To get rid of the victim mentality you’d need to build self-awareness first and then spend more time around your own thoughts. Try to disconnect from people around whom you feel insecure.
After disconnecting, set your personal goals, read books and work everyday to reach those goals.
Victim mentality is the result of lack of self-realization, when we spend time with ourselves we build better relationships with ourselves and our life.
Everyone can say they are free. But are they really free? Freedom is not about impressing OTHERS. You live for yourself and no one cares about your freedom but you.
A free person is someone who can do everything he desires.
There are infinite reasons to strive for personal freedom in life. And only when you act with above four components you’ll attain it earlier in life.
How could you life a joyous life? By doing things that you desire (travelling, joining events, relaxing on couch for long hours). Choose to be free, do whatever you want, of course not illegal works!